This was the title of a 1969 romantic comedy about traveling in Europe by bus. Brussels, the capital of Belgium, is a great place to visit. In fact, we two geeks had been there before.

The ship docked a long way from city center, so we hopped on a bus. The first, quick, stop was the atomium, a huge replica of an iron metal crystal (made of aluminum). Most of the passengers had not seen it before.

Our tour guide explained that the Catholic Church of Our Lady houses the royal crypt where all Belgian kings and their wives are buried. King Leopold I, who was the only Protestant king, died in 1865; his remains were moved to the church in 1876. His funeral was not held in this church due to his faith.

One of the first things our tour guide explained was that we were part of a traffic flow experiment in downtown Brussels. Traffic signals had been completely turned off in the center of town in the hopes of making traffic flow more easily, less jams. We don’t know if it worked, but it certainly kept us paying attention.

We were told many times in Belgium that what Americans call French fries were actually invented in Belgium. The mistake occurred in WWI when American troops came to the French-speaking part of Belgium and saw soldiers cooking potatoes in this unusual way. They brought the idea home and called the food French fries. So, please, friends, start asking for Belgian fries if you ever order them.

We walked through a covered alleyway which, our guide explained, was built for the upper class people to have exclusive places to shop and dine. These still have many shops and restaurants, especially featuring chocolate, lace, and diamonds, all well known in Belgium.

Belgium is known for its intricate lace designs, mostly hand-made. At many lace shops, tiny figurines of men are also on display. The guide said these were so the men would not get bored while the women chose their lace.

Most of these large old buildings around the Grand Place started out as guild buildings, similar to those in Antwerp.

The Hotel Amigo, once a prison, is now one of the most protected and secured buildings in Brussels, where important diplomats and politicians stay. On the other hand, police still use the word Amigo for a jail house; you don’t want to go to the amigo.

Our guide led us to the Manneken Pis statue, told us where to meet him if we wanted to go back to the ship, and left. This was because the statue was receiving a change of clothes and hundreds of tourists crowded around. Us two geeks stayed a long time, curiosity getting the better of our sore feet.

The most common legend says that this little boy went outside at night to do his business and saw a lit fuse leading to an explosive charge. Being a child, he decided to aim to put out the fire, which he accomplished. The town woke up the next morning to a happy surprise. Someone had put out a fire that was going to be used to start an enemy attack. The boy became a hero.

This new outfit was from North Macedonia. He will wear the outfit for only a few hours.

Still, the crowd waited, and so did we. Men in fancy, official uniforms and suits came through the crowd to near the statue.

We lost all of our group, as we had planned because we wanted to spend more time in Brussels.

After lunch, we wandered again looking for adventure.

We noticed a roped off area with signs about Cultural Beer Days and became curious. Clare got selected to learn how to pour a draft beer like a Belgian. The teacher was full of jokes and laughter.

Then we wandered again. Brussels is a fun city.

In the neighborhood of the Hilton hotel where we stayed a few years ago.

Second day in Antwerp, Belgium, with another walking tour.

We learned about the life and artistic techniques of Peter Paul Rubens, the artist who inspired the little orphan boy. Rubens, with his team of subordinate artists created over 2,500 paintings, which are on display all over the world.

We toured through part of Rubens home, though most of his place was closed for renovations.

There were cards to document your observational skills at the Rubenshuis.

We walked through narrow passages, viewed gardens sculptures and numerous architectural styles.

After lunch, we went back to the center of Antwerp to see the cathedral in more detail.

This magnificent church exhibits paintings as well as statues and stained glass, with numerous side chapels. People were praying, even though many tourists walked around.

Two of Rubens paintings were commissioned for this cathedral.

Time for bed before the ship arrived in Brussels!

Antwerp, with the second largest port in Europe, translates to throwing a hand (no, not like in a card game). A statue in the main square tells the story.

The metal roofs over parking areas near the docks were originally the markets for trade goods going on and off ships in the 19th century. They were ordered by Napoleon.

The Scheldt River is tied to the North Sea, with tidal variations up to 24 feet in a day. Disembarking the ship varies with the tide, and the crew worked hard to make sure we passengers were safe getting on and off the ship.

Getting into the city from our ship was a short but complicated walk. We went through the parking lot, then over the seawall, then we had to dodge the bicycle terrorists who not only don’t stop for pedestrians but most don’t have warning bells!

First we walked adjacent to the castle, which served as a prison for most of its existence (you get better rooms if you or someone who knows you pays). The castle, called Het Steen (The Stone), is the oldest building in Antwerp, dating from the 13th century.

Another statue in front of the castle shows a giant who comes out at night to throw all the drunks into the river. Seems a redundant occupation.

Antwerp is engaging. So much history and so many stories.

Wealthy inhabitants could afford the white or tan stone for their buildings, but most people built with less costly red brick. The butcher guild building and a few others contain some white stone in a pattern with the red brick, resembling bacon.

The people of Antwerp historically don’t like taxes. So when the government provided street lamps, they asked the people to pay for the lamps with taxes. The only exception was if the lights shone on a religious icon, like the Madonna. Surprisingly, over 2,000 Madonna statues appeared over street lamps! Only a few hundred survive.

The sculpture in the middle of the plaza is the Brabo Fountain, although there was no water while we were there. We passed the statue many times, and each tour leader told a slightly different version of the tale. All said that a giant was taking 50% from any ship that docked here (one guide implied that the giant was the government tax collector). But Silvius Brabo from the Roman Empire did not want to pay, so he cut the hand off the giant and threw it in the river. He’s the guy on the top of the statue, standing on the giant.

Many of the buildings around the central square were previously Guild Buildings, meat cutters guild, bread makers guild etc.

A well in front of the church had an intricate structure made by a blacksmith who was in love with a famous artist’s daughter. The artist told the suitor he was not good enough for his daughter’s hand. She must marry an artist, not a craftsman. One day when the father was not at home, the metal worker painted a real-looking fly on the butt of a devil in one of the artist’s paintings. The father came home, saw the fly and tried to brush it away. The fly looked so real that the artist thought it was alive! The artist then decided the metal worker was a true artist and could marry his daughter. The metal worker went on to become a famous painter in his own right.

Another story in the same square was about a young boy who became an orphan. His one goal was to see the paintings of Peter Paul Rubens, a famous artist. Although the boy was starving, he made his way to the church where some of Ruben’s’ paintings were on display. He snuck into the church while people were leaving one night, and fell asleep in front of a painting and died.

Japanese people love this story. All the school children learn about the boy Nello. Japanese people came to Antwerp, the origin of the story. They walked around the church but found nothing about this story. Recently, a sculptor was commissioned to make this statue mostly for the Japanese tourists.

That afternoon, we went back into Antwerp for Belgian delights: chocolate, waffles and beer. Pralines were invented in Antwerp, so they say, and each of us were invited into a candy store to choose two to sample. That was also where we got the severed hand cookies.

We visited the House of Waffles for a true Belgian delicacy. Light, fluffy waffles were served with a generous amount of whipped cream. We could order water, coffee or tea to go with them.

The beer tasting was at a tiny pub owned by a guy our tour leader knew. We tasted three generous portions of rather different beers. Everyone left happy.

Den Bosch is more formally known as ‘s-Hertogenbosch, the town we visited. First, some scenes from the ship.

A bus dropped us off at the train station, and we walked from there. While we walked, the ship had to circle in the water to avoid excessive docking fees. Hard to imagine docking fees higher than the gas the captain needed to cruise around for a few hours.

Our guide was native and proud of her city. Everything you’ve heard about was done first in her city. 😉

Our boat guide took us on her family’s boat for a snack and tour of the city. The snack, a Bosch Ball, is a specialty of this town, with lots of cream and chocolate. Most everyone finished theirs, even though the delicacy is quite large.

Our boat guide was full of fun, adding humorous quips to all her stories. Theirs is a family-owned boat, her father-in-law is the captain and she the hostess. Her husband is the chef.

The city was bombed and invaded during WWII, a fact prominent in the lives of current residents.

The town hired artists to make some walls more interesting. The effect was beautiful!

This city, Hertogenbosch, is proud of the fact that they kept their canals and rivers while many other nearby cities filled and paved their canals to make way for roads. Here, walking or biking are much easier than driving a car.

Some of the pathways cover canals and some cover a river. Boat tours of the under-city canals are available.

People in the Brabant, southern Netherlands, strongly dislike Heineken beer, even though some is made nearby. They joke that Heineken beer is made by making a horse drink their good beer, then collect what comes out of the horse at the other end!

Many buildings feature stepped edging to their roofs, typical of architecture in the Netherlands. Most buildings surrounding the square are family homes.

This famous statue, a little boy peeing, was created based on a story that when a child went to the wall of the city to relieve himself, he saw an invading army and ran to tell the authorities. City soldiers lined the wall, and the invasion dispersed. A bit like the boy putting his finger in a dike to save a city, except this one is supposed to be true.

Saint John’s Cathedral (Sint-Janskathedraal), built in many phases with different styles of architecture, is the largest cathedral in the Netherlands.

The southern provinces of the Netherlands are largely Catholic while the northern provinces largely Protestant. This historic distinction began in the 1600’s, before the Netherlands was independent. The southern areas were controlled by the Spanish Empire while the northern area were ruled by Germany. The Eighty Years’ War (1568-1648) secured the Dutch independence from Spain.

There are many wind turbines in the Low Countries, including these we saw while cruising.

The ship traversed a large lock on the river near the end of the day.

Tidal rivers in this region are becoming saltier as climate change reduces rainfall on the European continent.